I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
