He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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