This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
