Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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