Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
