He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
