we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The uberlube is also flammable
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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