We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
