something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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