:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit