if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
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