She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
