I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
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Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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