ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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