Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
His nipple licking is glorious
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