Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize