Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
