You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
