I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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