I think my fart just growled at me.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
