so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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