whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
