i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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