there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
