Do you still have your period?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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