I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
