I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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