dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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