Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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