Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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