It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
