yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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