my phone needs a breathalizer
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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