I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
