I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
