i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
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