This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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