I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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