i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
