Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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