I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They took my balls.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize