I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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