you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
