...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
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