Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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