For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
