Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize