AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Randomize
