just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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