I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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